Dr. Jekyll: Never have I had such a sense of foreboding.
Prof. Hyde: You must be referring to the impending start of the new semester.
Dr. Jekyll: Yes. I fear all of the wonderful momentum I have going regarding my research is about to end in ignominious fashion.
Prof. Hyde: Ah, but teaching is why you got into the profession.
Dr. Jekyll: Only to learn that teaching matters not a whit at most institutions.
Prof. Hyde: But the university is forever expounding on the excellence of its teachers…
Dr. Jekyll: …while only rewarding research.
Prof Hyde: So the university says one thing to the public--
Dr. Jekyll: --but in private conducts its business in a much different manner.
Prof. Hyde: It’s almost as if the university presents a friendly face to the public, but behind closed doors it becomes a different monster altogether.
Dr. Jekyll: Perhaps I could create a metaphor to describe this two-faced situation.
Prof. Hyde: Perhaps.
-- Dr. Jekyll and Prof. Hyde