This is the first summer during which I have not taught a session or jetted off to my homeland for a whirlwind of research and interviews, and have actually stayed home. Is it just me, or do the rest of you suffer from what feels like post-traumatic stress when summer rolls around.
I found myself wandering around as if I'd just survived some horrific experience that I couldn't quite articulate. I woke up, lumbered out of bed, unsure of what to do on Day 1-5 after grades have been submitted. I knew I had manuscripts to revisit, research to conduct, and stories to write, and yet... I found myself in my house and in my yard, wandering around as if I'd been away on a very long trip (Odysseus style) and had returned to find my house untouched, exactly as I remembered it from last summer.
So I started off gung-ho, typing away, determined to harness the power of free time and GET EVERYTHING DONE. I worked on syllabi for Fall, I cleaned my office, I wrote a story or two... and then I fell into a funk where I can't tell the days apart and wondered what I did all day as I wandered around the house feeling guilty for not having done much work... so I haven't enjoyed time off because I cannot shake the feeling that I must not waste the summer!
It has been very disturbing to feel so displaced! Granted, we didn't begin summer until three weeks ago because we are on the quarter system, but I do feel as if I have wasted three weeks feeling battered and disoriented. What are the rest of you doing this summer? Perhaps hearing what you've been up to will help me to kick myself into gear.
-- Contemplative Cynic